The Cause Within You

A Book Review


For those of us who have always been taught that God has a plan and a purpose for each of us, often the next question is "But what is it?" If this is something you've been asking yourself or if you already know your purpose but just don't where to begin, this book is probably for you. Author Matthew Barnett shares his personal story about founding a non-profit outreach called the Dream Center to minister to some of the most desperately hopeless people in Los Angeles, CA. Through sharing his journey and those of the many volunteers who have shared in his cause, he gives practical methods for finding the cause you were created for, rolling up your sleeves, and allowing God to bless your efforts.

It's difficult not to be inspired by Barnett and his team when reading about the lives that are changed through this ministry and the believers who are actually out in the world putting "feet to their faith." I think we all have a hunger to do something that really matters instead of just living a mundane, superficial life day after day. The way Barnett was able to translate his experiences, whether failures or successes, into practical applications for others makes this much more than an autobiography. It's also a challenge for each of us to find our personal cause and begin living it now or to join someone else's until we do.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Tyndale House Publishers as part of their book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Distractions

"It is our goal at Elevation [Church] to offer a distraction free environment for all our guests..." That was the response from a church who has found itself in a media firestorm after reportedly escorting a mother and her young disabled son from the Easter worship service when he shared an audible "Amen." My initial response was one of shock and anger because I, too, have been told that I was a distraction due to my health issues and was asked to leave my Christian college where I was studying for the ministry. I remember thinking, "Sure, I have chronic illness, but don't I deserve to have a life too?"

I really wanted to be sure I had the whole story and not just a bunch of one-sided media hype. When I spoke with Campus Pastor John Bishop, he admitted that "distraction was a poor choice of words" in this case and that they were trying to communicate that anyone exhibiting distracting behaviors like "ringing cell phones, people leaving from the front row and trying to go back to that same seat, or other loud noises" was encouraged to use the overflow area, which he says is about 20 feet from where Helms and her son were seated before they were relocated. According to Bishop, Helms was discreetly approached by an usher he describes as "an incredible man" on two occasions to make her aware the overflow room was available, but when her 12-year-old son, who has cerebral palsy, continued to make loud, unintelligible sounds (his mom says he was saying "Amen"), they were asked to move to the area where they could "have the exact same message and experience" without disturbing others. The pastor also explained, "There is no rule that keeps anybody out of the auditorium" and that "most people will remove themselves" to the overflow area if they are in one of these types of situations.

I'm a preacher's kid, so I understand the need for things to be done "decently and in order" and especially for people to have an opportunity to hear the life-changing message of the gospel. But I have to wonder where we draw the line. I was assured that Elevation Church doesn't discourage others from shouting "Amen" or being expressive in worship...unless it becomes a distraction. I guess because people could not understand Jackson Helms' expressions of worship, it was unacceptable. I'm just not sure what exactly should have been done in that situation. And on a personal note, I'm often afraid that my cataplexy attacks could distract others who may think I've fallen asleep, or that I really shouldn't sing in the choir because of the possibility of experiencing muscle weakness and collapsing before the congregation. Should I just not serve at all so I don't disturb anyone's experience?

This was a tough topic for me because it hit so close to home. But I can't help but think it's so easy to view people and their problems as a distraction instead of an opportunity for us to have compassion, to reach out, and to even learn from them. Even Jesus' apostles felt that children wanting to see Jesus were a distraction, but Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them." And when Jesus was preaching, some men tore off the roof to lower a paralyzed man down to be touched by the Healer. I bet that wasn't on the Order of Service!

I'm sure Bishop and the usher involved weren't trying to embarrass anyone or cause them to feel unwelcome. And from the statement the church later issued, it's clear they have programs for those with special needs and are doing more to learn about how to provide a better experience for them in the future. In 18 years of living with chronic illness I've learned that people do not understand what it's like to live with illness or disability, and they probably never will unless they experience it personally or through a loved one. They'll likely never appreciate the valiant effort it takes physically and emotionally for someone like us to even make it to a worship service. But we can all be a little more understanding and loving, realizing that church is not a building or a well-orchestrated performance, but a group of people who love the Lord and want to grow and share our lives with others like us. But life is chaotic, it's loud, and it's sometimes distracting to our vision and expectations. Let's make room for those distractions, even if someone tears off a roof now and then!

What if I Had Cancer?

I have a confession to make: sometimes I wish I had cancer. How twisted is that? And what would possess me to say such a thing? Of course, although I've had close family members waste away and die from cancer, I've never experienced it myself. I know it's a horrible and serious disease that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. But as crazy as it sounds, there have been several times in my life that I've found myself being jealous of people with cancer. Shocking?

About a year before my health took a serious downward spiral, a friend from church was diagnosed with breast cancer. You would not believe the outpouring of love and support shown to her and her family by our church! People came over to clean, brought meals, and offered to take her to doctor appointments. I'll never forget the time she was sharing the stories about the support from our church family and, knowing my own chronic health struggles, innocently asked, "People come over and help you out too, right?" There certainly have been a couple of people that have helped out before. But as far as the kind of constant support she was getting? Not even close.

Several months later I was diagnosed with narcolepsy with cataplexy, and my cataplexy was so bad that I was constantly falling down all over the house. I couldn't prepare meals, shower, dress myself, or do any household chores on my own. We asked our church for some help and in addition to being told we lived too far away from the church for people to serve us, a church leader admonished us, "It's not always your turn to be helped; sometimes it's your turn to help." Huh?! Anyone who truly knows us would realize what an ignorant statement that was. And we'd been faithfully attending and serving in that church for over 3 years.

So why was my experience so different from my friend with cancer? I'm not entirely sure, and I'd love some feedback from you. But here's what I've come up with so far.

1. I'm not dying. People seem to equate cancer with dying. I guess they feel that since you may die, they should serve you while they can. On the other hand, the long-term, daily struggles in the life of someone with chronic illness are largely ignored. Maybe it seems like too long a commitment?

2. I seem like I can handle it. I've always been a strong, independent person. I am a problem-solver, and I don't give up easily. Maybe people think, "If anyone can work through this, she can."

3. I don't know how to ask for what I need. I've had a few people offer to help, but I feel badly asking for and even accepting help because of what I've experienced in the past. Who wants to be helped grudgingly, our out of a sense of duty? Or what if I ask for help this time, and then I really need help another time but I've used up my "Ask for Help Card"? After all, maybe it's not my turn to be helped.

All I know is, everyone has a limit, a breaking point. We live on the edge of ours all the time. After two months of a major health setback we are about to fall off at the moment. But is it safe to ask for help? Or do I suffer alone and hope for the best? What do YOU do when you need help getting through the struggles of life with chronic illness?

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." -Ecclesiastes 4:8-10

Where's Tonto?

"I feel like the Lone Ranger," my husband said to me last night, sighing as he made the difficult decision to go home for a good night's rest rather than sticking it out at the hospital for another night with me. Part of me was angry and hurt because I am afraid to stay at the hospital alone due to unpleasant past experiences. On the other hand, I recognized he was burned out physically and emotionally and needed his own bed. While I've been either hospitalized or bed-ridden for the past month, he's been trying to run our small business, take care of things at home, take care of me and/or stay by my side 24/7 in the hospital, plan and prepare most of Thanksgiving dinner, run all of our personal errands, and take over the few administrative duties I can still do for our business all on his own. So his "Lone Ranger" sentiment is understandable.

But even the Lone Ranger had a side-kick: Tonto, someone he could talk to along the trail and count on to have his back. Even his horse Silver would pitch in once in a while, dragging him to water when he'd been injured by an outlaw. Because we have no family living nearby, we recently moved to a new area of a large city and have visited our new church only a handful of times, and we have very few friends in our lives that are willing to roll up their sleeves and be involved in our often-dramatic lives, we have sadly grown quite used to bearing our burdens alone. We are thankful for God's grace, for each other, as well as long-distance family and friends who pray for us and encourage us via phone and internet. But sometimes you just need back-up. Like someone who will offer to drop off one of your diet-specific meals, take you to the doctor, or stop by and let the dogs out for some exercise while you're in the hospital.

Everyone is busy and everyone has less-complicated friendships to put their effort into. I know this. But everyone needs someone to talk to along the trail. Someone to count on to have your back. So for MY Lone Ranger's sake...where's Tonto? Heck...I'm sure he'd even settle for someone to just drag him to water.

Some thoughts and ideas I've shared before about being someone's "side-kick":
If We Are the Body
Get With the Program

Tabitha Who?

"Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." I Corinthians 12:27

"With all your talent and potential, you're gonna do great things for God one day!" I heard this repeatedly as I was growing up. My competitive/achiever nature often caused me to stand out among my peers, and there was always another award to add to my list of accomplishments. I had big goals and high hopes for my future. That all changed when I became The Sick Girl.

Now my biggest achievements are having the strength to fold last week's laundry, empty the dishwasher for the first time in 3 days, or mop the kitchen floor for only the second time in four months (no, I'm not kidding!). My current successes would be considered failures by most. I may not even see another human being, besides my husband, for a week at a time. How then can I ever expect to do these "great things for God?"

God spoke to me recently through Sheila Walsh's new book. She talks about the story of Tabitha in Acts 9:36-42. If you're wondering, "Tabitha who?" it's because those 7 verses are the only mention of her in the Bible. She never did anything amazing that would stick out in our minds, and we certainly don't think of her when we name the great characters of the Bible. Yet, when she died, the Christians in her home town were devastated. They went so far as to send two men to track down Peter and ask him to come back right away. When Peter returned and found all the widows standing around grieving, he raised her from the dead through the power of Christ!

Why her? She wasn't an apostle or a prominent leader in the church. All she did was sew clothes for the poor. Verse 36 describes her as "always doing good and helping the poor." That's nice, but it's not a great work of God. Or is it? Maybe the things we consider important and worthy of notice are not quite as important to God. That's an epiphany for me! My religious background was always about what I was doing to serve the Lord. It was about being at the church "every time the doors are open," going on weekly visitation, and singing solos before the entire congregation - all things I'm not physically able to do anymore. Does that mean I've missed my chance to fulfill God's purpose for my life? The Enemy would like for me to think so!

But the Bible tells me that God has a purpose for me and a place in the body of Christ where I can serve. These days that may not be a high-profile position in my church or community. Maybe it's being an encourager to others also dealing with chronic illness by praying for them, saying an uplifting word on Facebook, being honest about my struggles through this blog, or making a Prayer Shawl for them in my church's knitting ministry (kind of like Tabitha was doing in her church!).

But let's not miss the end of Tabitha's story. Verse 42 tells us that the story of her resurrection "became known all over Joppa, and many people believed in the Lord." Because she became sick and died, Jesus Christ received glory, and many precious souls were saved. What a testimony! Isn't that what all believers are called to do with our time on Earth?

Dear Lord, help me to remember that You have a purpose for my life every single day. Even though I may not feel like an important contributor to Your work, I will trust that you will use my humble offering - right here where I am - to glorify Your name and cause others to believe in You.

How the Church Can Minister to the Chronically Ill

Ministering to the Chronically Ill: 20 Ways That Take 20 Minutes
by Lisa Copen

Rest Ministries (www.restministries.com), the largest Christian organization that specifically serves the chronically ill, recently did a survey and asked people to "List some of the programs or resources a church could offer to make it more inviting and comfortable." They have provided a sampling of some of the 800+ responses, all of which could be done in 20 minutes or less.

1. Encouragement emails.
2. Make sure the handicapped stalls in the restroom are functioning and clean.
3. Padded chairs or cushions, room for wheelchairs, and plenty of room for my family to sit with me.
4. Be open-minded about a support group for the chronically ill like HopeKeepers. It would make me feel very special, knowing that there is an understanding of people's needs that are not always visible.
5. Add more disabled parking, even if they are temporary spots.
6. Educate the ushers that people arriving late may have difficulty walking or getting out of cars and will need some assistance.
7. Ask volunteers to call people with chronic illness just to check on them when they don't make it to services.
8. When suppers are given, recognize that I may need help getting my meal--or at least understand that I won't be able to wait in a long line.
9. Be gentle when giving people big hugs. It can topple over or hurt a person.
10. Have a video tape of the service, not just a live web cast. Not all our computers work that well.
11. Make sure that the church doors aren't too difficult to open or at least have mechanical assistance if they're unusually heavy.
12. Stop telling me that if I really believed and had faith I would be healed by now. Please don't insist how good I look, because I know for a fact that I look terrible and miserable that day.
13. Offer me ways to serve within the church that can be performed regularly, but not on a set schedule. I still want to contribute, but I need some flexibility so that I can do a job when I feel well enough to do so.
14. Have sermon notes available so I can listen later or even just review what I didn't catch the first time.
15. Acknowledge National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week. Rest Ministries has a nice book list of top 100 Christian books for the chronically ill. It would make a nice display in your bookstore that week.
16. Just mention chronic illness occasionally! Don't forget to talk about it in sermons as one of the challenges many people face just like unemployment or divorce.
17. Have Christian volunteers from church that will clean house for small fee. Some have offered to clean my house, but I cannot accept charity yet, but neither can I afford to pay a regular house cleaning service.
18. Help with some of the small costs of providing encouraging books and resources for the church library the chronically ill can check out.
19. Remember how many caregivers are in the church, not just caregiving for their parents, but also for their spouses or ill children.
20. Have copies of sermons for free on CD or computer.
Find over 500 ways to encourage a chronically ill friend in the book "Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend" at www.beyondcasseroles.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I know that some days can seem like more than you can handle. Remember that the Lord promises to never leave you or forsake you. Cling to that. Even when you don't feel his presence He is still there. I tell my 6-year-old son that God is working "under cover." I know I am each day, especially righr now!

Blessings,

Lisa Copen, Rest Ministries Founder
Rest Ministries Chronic Illness Pain Support

If We Are the Body...

A good friend and I have been discussing lately the issue of the body of Christ serving one another and bearing each others' burdens. If we as Christians were truly following the example of Christ and the early church, there would be a lot fewer Christians who are feeling defeated, disconnected, and overwhelmed by life's trying circumstances. That is exactly what the Enemy wants, of course: to keep Christians out of the fight and out of the way of his plans to thwart the cause of Christ.

My dear friend is a young mother who truly desires to please God and raise her children to know and serve Him. But with three very young children at home, she often feels overwhelmed and in desperate need of a break or some quality time alone with her husband. I know that there must certainly be other mothers in her local church who find themselves in this situation as well; could they not trade babysitting services to give other moms a break? What about single ladies in the church or young married couples without children? This could be a real opportunity for them to serve and to learn what it is like to walk in another's shoes. What about a retired couple whose grandchildren live far away? What a mutual blessing it would be for them to "adopt" some children from their church and offer to take them to the zoo, the museum, or the park for the day so Mom can actually get her hair cut or go out on a date with her husband!

But what happens instead? We look at our own situation and how frustrated and discouraged we are that we're a busy mom, a lonely widow, or a couple struggling with the pain of infertility. The Bible tells us that we should follow Christ's example, look at how others around us are struggling, and put their needs above our own (Philippians 2:1-11). When we are willing to do this, not only will we be blessed for our selflessness, but we might find that our own needs will be fulfilled as well. For example, I have a friend with 7 children who has basically been a single mom for the past several months. Yet every time she is going to be near the health food store, she calls me, who is stuck at home because of chronic illness and cannot drive, to see if there's anything I need from the store. She also has a job outside the home, but she came over my house with one of her daughters on a Saturday and cleaned my house because she saw that I was having a tough time. And my husband and I have been able to serve some of her needs as well. What a wonderful blessing to both of us! This is the plan God has for His people! Every part of the body has its own abilities and weaknesses and can serve another member in areas where they are weak.

But we are often unwilling to step out of our comfort zone or make a sacrifice for another brother or sister in Christ. After all, it's more convenient to just invite that couple over that you've known for 10 years because their kids get along with your kids and your spouses hit it off. But what about that couple that's new to the church and have no established friendships or even family that they can fellowship with or call on when they need some help? What about the couple that doesn't have children? It may be a bit more challenging to hang out with that couple because your children won't be occupied and playing with their friends, but don't those people need friends too? You're comfortable having a girls' night out with your two best girlfriends, but what about your friend with chronic illness? She might slow you down at the mall or the beach because she can't keep up with your pace. How about having a single mom over to your house so her boys can throw a football around or learn to work on the car with your sons and your husband? - guy things her son doesn't get to do.

Just something to think about. We all have needs and struggles in life, but we don't have to handle it all on our own. God has adopted us into His family, and He has given us thousands of brothers and sisters in Christ from all different backgrounds, family situations, financial conditions, and special talents and abilities that we can draw upon. Let's reach out to our Christian family and build one another up so that we can bring glory to God and win souls for eternity by the example of our faith and testimony.

"...there are many parts, but one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, 'I don't need you!' And the head cannot say to the feet, 'I don't need you!' On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." -I Corinthians 12:20-27